You make many good observations and it is great to see someone think about this topic instead of just yell emotional invective at people. Absolutely, we need respect and compassion for everyone. We need more discussion about this topic and especially the listening side of discussion.

My opinion is we do well to separate the concept of gender from that of gender labels. I have taken to the idea that there may be as many genders as their are individual people, and the problem is the labels that stuff individuals into categories. Let every individual person be themselves, and accept every individual person as an individual. Dispense with all labels and the judgments that inescapably accompany labels. https://medium.com/inserting-philosophy/how-about-we-just-get-rid-of-gender-labels-altogether-7190b234eeb7